This was a rough day, but I kept track of what I ate, so “atta girl’s” for me. I ate extra veggies for lunch. I planned a relatively health sweet-treat in a large enough quantity that I wouldn’t feel deprived. For me that was 2-serving. Only then I ate 3 servings before the day was done. I am not beating myself up. I am managing this week to the best of my ability and then I am rejoicing when my appetite returns to normal and my cravings disappear.
Over the years I’ve noticed that one of my biggest triggers is Fred cooking for me or offering me food. He does it as a form of cherishing me, of providing for me. I am a great big sucker for Fred looking down at me all sweet and earnest and offering me a bowl of something and saying “I made it for you.” and then grinning shyly as I taste it. I bend like a cheap popsicle stick under a clunky homemade pudding pop. Fred is my weakness, and I think that’s as it should be.
He made the chili for dinner, with lots of chunky vegetables and dried beans and I really enjoyed it. Fred is a good cook. Then he was out, visiting friends, and came home with nearly a dozen fresh, delicious, store-bought donuts. He fidgeted on his feet, looking at me, telling me that he didn’t know if he should offer me any or not. That he knows I’m trying to stick to my food plan, but that these poor, innocent donuts just jumped into his car and he couldn’t very well leave them on the street. I mean, Just imagine what could happen to them all alone on the harsh streets of our small town. Why anyone could take advantage of them! So Fred, being the nice guy he is, brought them home where they would be safe and warm and protected, in his belly.
I grinned, and laughed with him, because Fred is the love of my life and he is my best friend and he is also a compulsive over eater who will accidentally sabotage me (subconsciously) and it’s not like he can control that, and I am certain he never does it on purpose. He just loves me and gets mixed up sometimes in the way he expresses it. So I covered the box with a clean pillow case so I couldn’t see it, and promptly forgot they were there. With all of their wheaty, sugary, fatty goodness. Instead I had a 3rd serving of peach crisp before bed.
This left me at 1800 calories for the day, which while not ideal, is a far sight better than a donut binge. So instead of beating myself up for not being perfect, I am thanking God for the ability to say no to donuts which have the added goodness of being provided by my sweet, sincere, and adorably fuzzy Freddy Bear. Who I often want to kick and kiss in the same breath. Must be true love.
Recipe for peach crisp coming later today.
- 1/4 cup soymilk
- 3/4 cup coffee
- 1/2 cup apple juice
- 1/4 cup sliced mushroom
- 1 teaspoon margarine
- 2/3 cup egg whites
- 1 packet corn grits, instant
- 1 gluten free matzo cracker (Yehuda)
- 1 cup carrot sticks
- 1 cup celery sticks
- 1/2 cup sliced mushroom
- Small can sardines, drained
- 2 servings Peach Crisp From Canned Peaches
- 1 cup turkey chili with beans
- 2 ounces cornbread
- 1 serving Peach Crisp from Canned Peaches
Per Serving: 1822 Calories; 39g Fat (19.2% calories from fat); 80g Protein; 292g Carbohydrate; 27g Dietary Fiber; 166mg Cholesterol; 3020mg Sodium.
Calories By Percentage: 19% Fat; 63% Carbohydrate; 17% Protein.
Exchanges: 9 Grain(Starch); 7 Lean Meat; 5 Vegetable; 6-1/2 Fruit; 5 Fat; 2 Other Carbohydrates.